The 2024 Netflix movie Strained, directed by Okechukwu Oku, tells the story of Ebere and her journey to reconnect with her long-lost mother. Once Ebere becomes a mother herself, balancing work and family becomes challenging for her, especially with a new baby at home. Her husband, Ozo, loves and supports her, but she still needs guidance. With Ozo’s sister out of town, Ebere has no choice but to turn to her mother, who abandoned her in childhood. But why did her mother leave? And will their strained relationship improve over time? Let’s find out.
Spoilers Ahead
What was the initial interaction between Ebere and her mother?
Strained movie introduces us to Ebere and Ozo, a young and loving couple who has had their first child, a girl. They know that being new parents will bring a lot of responsibility. They live alone, and when Ozo has to go to Calabar for work, Ebere feels overwhelmed about being left alone with the baby. She also wants to go back to work herself, which adds to her stress. Ozo suggests calling Ebere’s mother for help, but Ebere feels hesitant because her mother wasn’t there for her when she needed her most. When Ozo’s sister couldn’t come to help, they had to call Ebere’s mother. Ebere is upset but realizes she needs someone’s support. When Ebere’s mother arrives, she’s happy to be at her daughter’s house for the first time, as she was not even invited to the wedding. She naturally bonds with Ozo and Ebere because of her warm personality.
However, Ebere struggles with her mother’s presence and attitude. Ozo tries to encourage Ebere to be nicer to her mother so they can rebuild their relationship, but Ebere just wants a helping hand and nothing else. As Ozo goes to work, the differences in parenting styles between Ebere and her mother become apparent. Ebere’s mother uses traditional methods, which clash with Ebere’s modern approach. Despite their differences, Ebere’s mother tries to reconnect with her daughter by helping her with household tasks and taking care of the baby. Ebere sometimes gets frustrated with her mother’s old-fashioned ways and calls her names, insulted her saying she is an illiterate, which hurts her deeply. But Ebere’s mother sees herself as here to serve her daughter and granddaughter and be close to them. Ebere struggles with this idea at first, but eventually realizes that her mother’s intentions come from a place of love. When her mother complains how she was denied the chance to care for her own granddaughter, Ebere begins to understand her mother’s feelings better.
Why did her mother abandon Ebere in the first place?
Ebere’s friend, Maria, came to her house. She’s a beautiful girl. As they talked, Ebere’s mother overheard their conversation. Maria shared that her husband lies, cheats, drinks too much, and beats her every day. She’s tired of the abuse and wants to leave. But Ebere advised her to think before leaving because marriage is important. There are good and bad days in marriage, she said. Ebere’s mother couldn’t stay silent. After Ebere left, she hugged Maria and told her she was beautiful. She encouraged Maria to follow her heart and leave the abusive household. Maria should leave as soon as possible, her mother said. Ebere heard their conversation and felt worried. She thought her mother was encouraging bad ideas in Maria, like leaving her marriage, just like her mother had left her and her father. But then Ebere learned about her mother’s own painful past. Her mother revealed that Ebere’s father used to get drunk and beat her every day! It was unbearable! So, one day, she decided to leave to save herself from more harm. But leaving wasn’t easy. She had no money and had to rely on relatives for help. Later, when she became a nanny, she came back to the town to meet Ebere, but it was too late. Her father got a restraining order against her, which made her unable to visit him anymore.
Even though she wanted to meet her, she could not. She expected that Ebere would at least call her to her wedding, but as she never did, it was devastating for her. But if you see Ebere’s point of view, you will realize how much she would also miss her mother. She said the heartbreaking part was that her mother did not take her with her when she ran away, and she grew up in that toxic home where torment like this was normalized. Her father used to torment her stepmother as well every day, but she never left her. But what happened to her stepmother? She is in a wheelchair now after getting beaten by her husband and suffering a spinal injury. But Ebere is hurt, and none of the logical thoughts are coming into her head. But as Maria met her again and said that she was pregnant and was going to leave her husband because she did not want to bring her baby up in that toxic household, Ebere said she understood her and would support her in any decision. Then she realized maybe this was the reason her mother also wanted to get out of that house – just to live. Thus, their relationship got better. She started taking care of her mother’s arthritis, going out shopping, buying makeup, and cooking together. She was ready to give their relationship a second chance, to be a proper mother-daughter duo again.
In Strained‘s ending, we see their relationship getting strained again. Once, Eberle’s infant had a stomach ache, and her mother gave her palm oil, which made the infant foam from her mouth. Ebere rushed to the hospital to be treated, and thankfully, she was okay. But that made her drive her mother out of her home because her mother and her old-fashioned methods made her daughter suffer needlessly, and she could not bear it. But as she left their home, there was a void in Ebere’s life again. She started missing her mother even more. One day, she typed a message saying how much she loved her and missed her, but never sent it to her. But Ozo saw it on her phone and sent the message on her behalf, and her mother came back to her house again. Ebere was happy to see her. And we can expect that this time around, she won’t be going anywhere. After all, all mothers and daughters fight, right? But how we get through it each day—that’s where the real magic lies.
