A movie about bad parenting and (subsequent) generational trauma is not exactly something you could call groundbreaking. But the subject is universally relevant. Exhibiting Forgiveness is particularly special because director Titus Kaphar has carved this movie out of his own life. Kaphar is a visual artist who has used several of his own works—as paintings made by the movie’s lead, Tarrell, played by Andre Holland. The movie may be his first foray into cinema, but Kapher’s narrative (he has written the screenplay as well) is strong enough to hold you from start to finish. It’s not an easy watch, obviously, but it leaves you with a lot to ponder.
Spoilers Ahead
What is the movie about?
The plot is fairly simple here. Tarrell is a celebrated painter who has pretty much everything: fame, a good marriage with Aisha, who’s a singer, and a cute little boy, Jeremiah. Sadly, though, he had a deeply troubled past thanks to his father, La’Ron, doing a number on him, which keeps haunting him—so much so that he has severe panic attacks and wakes up in the middle of the night. Aisha is understandably concerned and wants Tarrell to go see a doctor. Unbeknownst to Tarrell, La’Ron turns up in his hometown, all battered and broken from a recent scuffle at a liquor shop, where he was actually trying to prevent a robbery, but the younger man got the better of him. He’s aided by his brother, Michael, who then drops him at the church shelter. La’Ron is a devout Christian, so it’s not a problem for him to get involved in God’s work.
Meanwhile, Tarrell’s mother, Joyce, is about to leave her old house and move in with her son, at least for the time being. But when Tarrell, along with Aisha and Jeremiah, reaches his hometown to pick up Joyce, he finds out that Joyce has purposefully arranged a reunion between La’Ron and him. Tarrell is understandably shocked and angry, as he is unwilling to even have a conversation with his father.
What happened in the past?
Instead of laying down everything, the narrative deliberately holds the curtain over things that happened years ago and slowly reveals it—almost in thea manner of peeling an onion. Obviously, this is a great approach that keeps the audience invested in the movie. Despite not wanting to have anything to do with his father, Tarrell finally decides to have a heart-to-heart with the man for the sake of Joyce. Thanks to that, we get to know that La’Ron’s dad was a piece of work. He was a minister who would not hesitate to abuse his wife, who, in La’Ron’s own words, was a saint. Tarrell’s grandfather even endangered his life by throwing him against the table when he was a baby. On the very same day, he waved a gun in his wife’s and La’Ron’s face. The description clearly paints the man as a menace, but La’Ron still believes his father was a good man with all the best intentions for his family.
Being tough is the only parenting La’Ron knew, and he tried exactly that with Tarrell. From taking the kid to assist him in manual labor to treating him like an adult, La’Ron did the full ‘be a man’ routine on his son. One day, Tarrell accidentally hurt his feet, but instead of taking the boy to the hospital, La’Ron forced him to work. Even his son’s bloodied feet couldn’t melt the man. If this was not it, La’Ron was also an addict, and that kept getting worse with each passing day. In the present, we see him narrating a story about how he got into drugs because of his cousin, who was also a junkie. That honestly sounds like the man trying to justify his wrongdoings. In fact, most of the words La’Ron utters seem like that only.
Does Tarrell Forgive His Father?
Considering how Joyce (and also La’Ron himself) was constantly urging Tarrell to let the past go and forgive his failure of a father, I feared the movie might get overly sentimental and end badly. Thankfully, that doesn’t quite happen, and Exhibiting Forgiveness delivers a very mature ending that makes all the sense in the world.
One of the major aspects of the movie has to be the relationship between Joyce and La’Ron. While Joyce had to let go of La’Ron after what he did to Tarrell, she never stopped loving the man. Of course, there’s no logic in loving a red flag like La’Ron—as we see, Tarrell is quite baffed upon knowing his mother is still in love with La’Ron. But love is the kind of thing that doesn’t always have to follow logic. Whatever the reason may be, Joyce did love La’Ron, and her feelings—despite having a second child (Tarrell’s half brother Quentin) with another man—never went away. She was also sick and in no position to actually move in with Tarrell, probably why she desperately wanted the father and son to make amends. When Joyce suddenly ends up at the hospital, Tarrell and La’Ron both come to a point where they must put the past on hold for the time being. We see Tarrell being all cordial to his father, even though he doesn’t try to hide his overall disappointment with La’Ron. There’s a very important scene where he tells La’Ron that he thinks it is essential that Jeremiah cries sometimes. That is a clear indication of Tarrell denouncing the disgusting masculinity that made his own childhood quite the living hell.
Tarrell’s artistry is another important thing here. I would say that could only happen because Joyce was stubborn enough to get rid of La’Ron. She clearly deserves the credit for the kind of sensitive man and brilliant artist Tarrell has become. I was glad that the movie deliberately skipped over the part where Joyce dies, and we don’t see anything from her funeral. Instead, we see Tarrell getting into quite a frenzy and making an impromptu painting of his father in his hotel room. For Tarrell, that is the truest form of showing love and appreciation for Joyce. That stunning artwork makes it to the final exhibition of Tarrell. It is, of course, a runaway success, and his agent, Regina, couldn’t be happier. Tarrell, however, still seems to be struggling. La’Ron’s sudden presence only makes it worse. You’ve got to feel for Tarrell when he ends up being rude to a potential buyer, despite trying his best to keep it together.
By now, you realize that the only way Tarrell can be free is by moving on from his past, i.e., his father. That’s why he offered forgiveness to La’Ron. It is more for the sake of himself—and his family—than his father. Giving La’Ron the artwork, which Tarrell describes as the door that doesn’t need to be opened, is another sign that he genuinely wants the future to be free of La’Ron. All of Tarrell’s artwork, though, stems from his traumatizing past. But him trying to move on is the healthy choice here, and it is great to see that the story is letting Tarrell have that win. The final scene of Tarrell destroying one of his own artworks by removing the child (his own teenage self) who’s mowing lawns with bloodied feet. He doesn’t need to remember that anymore. That part of his life has ended for good. From here on, Tarrell is on the path of recovery, and the future does look quite bright. He might meet La’Ron again in the future, but I don’t think he’s going to have those panic attacks anymore.
